The rabbit hole

Three weeks have passed since the last class, and I seem to have fallen down the rabbit hole.  Feeling better from the flu, crawling out of the rabbit hole, but still far from normal, so I don’t get too much done except for work.  No yoga, not much writing, and just the bare minimum, very low energy level.  Definitely a strange feeling after being on such a high the last six or seven weeks.  Keep telling myself to honor what my body needs at this point, and to try to be patient.  But I don’t feel like being patient anymore.
I miss you guys.  I miss yoga.  I miss moving.  I miss writing.  And as each day passes, my crossroads rush toward me with increasing speed.  As of today, I have 17 days left of work at Virgin … 17 days after seven years.  I am a bit nervous, but truly more excited to turn at that upcoming fork in the road ready to veer off for destinations unknown.
Where will this wayward yogini find herself six months from now … one year from now … three years from now?  I’m feeling what I can only describe as a freedom rising from somewhere deep inside, and an excitement for what lies ahead. (Kenny’s Second Chances).
Guess this is somewhat like what the pioneers felt as they journeyed ahead armed only with a dream and courage.  My journey is a very watered-down version these many years later (no fear that I might be eaten along the way traveling with the Donner party) but nonetheless, for a modern day gal, I’ve been packing my gear for the wagon, and the journey is near.  Six weeks ago I would have said I was the fortunate one to be a modern day gal.  But something I learned in my class is that hardship brings its own reward.  If it doesn’t come with too much pain, then the reward is pretty amazing.  Leaves me contemplating what those pioneers felt as they reached their destinations, if they were lucky enough to arrive with their loved ones alive.
It must have been an incredible feeling, the kind of feeling that lasts a lifetime, contentment every which direction you look.  For those settlers, the view was long and wide, as far as the eye could see.  Most of us don’t even know what that might feel like.  Our views reach probably as far as our next door neighbor.  But there are always places to visit (my favorite, the ocean) to contemplate our desires, our dreams, and to take stock of all that we have to be grateful for.  Compared to the pioneers, we have to improvise a bit, but it all equals out in the end, as we don’t have to risk losing our loved ones to make the journey.
Checking the wheels on my wagon, packing my gear, looking forward ….  some post-class yoga lessons to share when I’m back up to par.
Namaste

2 Comments

  1. 15 days now! Wow!! You mention places to visit and contemplate things and I can’t wait to show you my bench at my favorite campground. 🙂


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